Friday 22 May 2020

From Chester with Love - Team Mates


What is there to say about Gareth Edwards that has not already been said a hundred times? He's been with Caernarfon Town for six years and, in all fairness, has defied age more than anyone else I now. Eards told me recently that Gaz is forty six years old and, in my opinion, he's been getting better each season for the Cofis.
The Big Man has featured regularly in this Team Mates series, mostly as a bit of a rascal who is not averse to a bit of shithousery but also for being a good guy and a bit of a rock in the squad. 
He is also seen as a bit of a James Bond character around the Oval. Tall, good-looking and possessing a million dollar smile, Gaz would fit into the role of 007 effortlessly. 
From Chester with Love, GoldenGaz, The Man with the Golden Smile and Licence to Thrill, all Bond films that would have benefitted from having the Big Man starring in them. However, it is to our benefit that Gaz decided to stick to football and, in all seriousness, he has been one of the best 'imports' we have had at the Oval in forty years. 
Over to you Gaz....   

Which three team mates would you invite for dinner and what would you cook for them? 


Alex Ramsey – a lovely, polite young man. I like to hear what he’s got up to in the week which usually contains some form of mischief.
Jay Crowther - another one of my car squad. If he’s with me he’s not out in town getting himself in bother, so it’s for his own safety.
Joe Wills and Gaz Evo - two of my good mates who are joined at the hip. Joey and I have been good pals for a few years now so I need him there for moral support and Evo in case it gets out of hand with the neighbours, he can flash his warrant card.

I would cook the guys a Thai Green Curry. 

Brads
Ideal person to be stuck on a desert island - Sion Bradley. He would provide me with hours of entertainment. Not the sharpest tool in the box but second to none for laughs. Never stops smiling, top lad.

Worst trainer - Would have been my old mate Kev Roberts before this season, the rat couldn’t string two passes together. But it goes to Alex Ramsey for attendance to one training session in three years.

Worst Barber - there are a few shouts for this. Eards needs to give up on that sweep over (Bobby Charlton). However, Bradders takes the title on this, he’s hanging on for dear life. He needs to give up and give that ginger wig a trim.

Biggest Joker - Joe Wills without doubt is relentless. Always looking to stitch one of the lads and he bullies Fish every week. He is ruthless.


Loves a night out
Good on a night out – there are some good looking lads in our team, I top the lot but a close second you’ve got young Ryan Wills who not only has a cheeky smile but loves a little two step and you will always find Crowther or Breesy being menaces in and around. The gaffer fancies himself step on the dance floor. Rambo was born for a night out and you will always of places. a bit on a night out and Fish is usually kicking off and getting us thrown out.

Worst on a night - Daz Bach, threatens to come on an end of season but drops the shoulder the night before and goes AWOL!!

Hardman - This would have to be Jamie Crowther. He loves taking videos of himself boxing so who am I to argue? 

Biggest moaner - this is a close one. Super Danny Brookwell like a little moan from time to time but nobody comes close to Joe or Rambo. If I had to pick one it would probably be Rambo. Loves moaning from his line but won’t step off it!

Ry Wills
Who would you not like in your 4x4 relay team - I’ve had some bad press in this section from my fellow team mates but none of them will challenge me to a race.
Crowths turns like the QE2, Mr Caernarfon Nathan Craig is not known for his pace but has the best left foot in the league and my other Centre Half partner, Ry Wills, sometimes runs in quicksand. And Gruff John too, he takes a while to get into his side. I’d beat them all. 

Funniest moment - scoring the winner and beating Bangor!


I’ll nominate the vice skipper, Jamie Crowther, to be next up…..

Thursday 14 May 2020

Team Mates: Gaz Evo


Gareth Evans arrived at the Oval during the same summer as Eards and I think it's fair to say that he is a favourite of the Gaffers'. 
The midfielder has been a mainstay of the team in his three seasons with the Cofis and I believe he is one of the most underrated players I've seen in the yellow shirt. 
Other players are often mentioned when it comes to unsung heroes and yet rarely does Gaz receive a mention. He may not get the plaudits, but the team does not quite function as well without him and certainly his recent form has been a reason why we put in some excellent performances in the few weeks before the lockdown.
For those of you surprised by my more serious tone to this introduction I ask you to remember that Evo is an employee of the local constabulary and therefore I can see no advantage at all in taking cheap shots at him here!

Over to you Gareth.... 

Which three team-mates would you invite for dinner and why? Also, what would you cook for them?
My mate Joe Wills as he would only moan if he missed out Gary Edwards the giraffe for some stories (they can last a journey to training sometimes) and Noah Edwards for the after dinner karoake, plus he would be a cheap guest, a bag of Haribos and he would be happy!  

The meal would have to be a classic steak and chips.

Ideal person to be Stuck on an island with.
Tough one but this has to be Mike Peo. He comes out with some rubbish which would bound to cheer me up being stuck on an Island, but he’d be no good if I need to get off the island as he lacks common sense in abundance.

Worst Trainer.
No brainier. Rambo for sure and probably Breesey, both for the same reasons.

Big Biceps, interesting haircut
Worst barber.
There’s a few out there now during this lockdown. Breesey had an interesting one during our quiz! Unfortunately, I'm going to have to pick ffrind da fi o Blaenau, Brads. I don't think they have hairdressers in Blaenau and to be fair it's just as well for him as he's going very thin in his early years. 

Worst banter.
Probably go Darren Bach, just purely as he comes out with some random stuff now and again. Fish’s training sessions could be considered to be up there though, along with the gaffer’s pre match presentation.

Hardman.
If it’s size, Breesey’s biceps have to be mentioned. Big Gary Edwards fancies himself and does love a battle with any frontman in the league to be fair. Brooky loves a full blown 50/50 too.

Biggest joker.
Has to be the gaffer Sean. He just doesn’t stop from when we start training to the end and then again on match days! All the lads are in stitches listening to him.

Good on a night out.
Brads is good on a night out, We room shared in Dublin and he was on it until the very end. Daz Bach when we had our league winning night out a few seasons ago at the races was a joke all day.

Worst on a night out. 
Gary Edwards loves an early night and Fish usually ends up being escorted out of a club early doors.....

Biggest moaner.
No brainer, Joe Wills hands down is the biggest Moaner. And like he said about himself I do moan a lot mainly about Fish’s poor refereeing decisions during training, and yeah I love a moan if I am taken off during a game whether we are winning or not. I’d rather that than be happy to be taken off.

Who would you not want in your 4 x 100m relay team? 
It’s the usual suspects who are not blessed with third or fourth gear….
Ry Wills

First is Jamie Crowther, who runs in reverse.
Gary Edwards the giraffe wouldn’t make it.
Ry Wills is another who often runs like he’s treading quick sand.
And Nath would have to be left out, best technically but…

Funniest Moment.
There have been so many both in training, when Fish has a nibble at Joe and  match days when Daz hasn’t a clue what Eards is talking about, but mainly during our team nights out. We had a right laugh in Dublin with Brads eating his kebab the following morning on the floor and the races was brilliant!

I now nominate Gary Edwards….

Saturday 9 May 2020

Joe's Team Mates: The Fringe

The fringe photo
One name that has appeared more than others in the Team Mates series is Joe Williams, and it's true that he's a divisive character. By far the biggst moaner in the first team squad, Joe is also one of the best defenders in the Welsh Premier League and so, whilst it must be a nightmare to be around him for too long, I'm sure his team mates, and everyone at the club, is more than happy to put up with him in small doses. 
It's also fair to say that I have been looking forward to receiving Joe's answers more than any other player, apart from Messi(!), and he certainly has not disappointed!
One thing I have always refused to do with the blog is let anyone tell me what I should, or should not put in it, and so, whilst Joe hs asked me not to use his 'fringe' photo, for obvious reasons, I'm using it. Just because I can.   
One of the team's most consistent players since his arrival at the Oval, his answers are also consistently, and brutally, honest so here's what Joe thinks of his team-mates....

Which three team mates would you invite for dinner and why? And what would you cook for them? 

Tough one this because you could invite any combination of players and have a laugh with all of them. Gruff John would be the entertainment for the evening on the piano and I’d have Fish waiting on the table for us.

My three guests at the table would be....
I’d have to go for my mate Melvin Evo, my partner down the right hand side.
Big Gaz Eds would have to be at the table, known him for a long, long time now and he’s a top bloke.

Leo lives on Starmix
Then Rambo would make the table, we sit next to each other in the changies and if anyone needed some moisturiser during the meal Rambo could sort us all out.

Meal - Hickorys, We’ve had a fair few good nights out in Hickorys and Gaz Eds could sort us out with a VIP table because he runs Chester.

Ideal person to be stuck on a desert island with?

Not Noah as he can’t even cook toast and only eats Haribo starmix!
It’s a close call between Leo and Ry Wills but I’d go with Ry Wills I reckon. He performed very well in the zoom quizzes during the lockdown so some good knowledge there and he’s a grafter so we’d have a shelter built in no time.

Worst trainer - yes Breese dog and Rambo are up there but in fairness they do live hours away. I’m going for Brads because he always cuts corners in the warm-up and I always get in his head, just like when I used to play against him when he was at Port. 
Joe bullying Brads during a local derby

Worst Barber - again Brads gets a mention, no explanation needed. However, I’m going for the gaffer Sean Eards though because I’ve never seen anyone have two fringes, one on the front and one down the side (he’ll be gutted I’ve gone for him there because he loves his hair). He should really borrow one of them to Brads to be honest.

Worst Banter – Fish. I feel like I’ve taught him a lot over the years so his banter has improved but he just can’t resist a nibble. Nothing makes me laugh more than when he has a bite which is most trainings and games. Credit where it’s due though he’s probably the most passionate football man I’ve come across and is a top guy.

Hardman - Young Noah Edwards, never ever backs down from anyone, he’s like a little Jack Russell. He’s come out of his shell massively since first joining and is also a dark horse with the old karaoke in the car on the way home from away games, loves the classics Fleetwood Mac and U2. Leo Psycho Smith deserves a mention here as well, very tough man!!!

Biggest Joker - the team is full of them, the banter is always flying around the changies so you’ve got to be on your toes. I’d say Eards though, he’s always laughing and would never a miss a chance to take the mick out of any of the lads.

Good on a night out - Gaz Eds always organises all the nights out and is a right laugh after a few sherbets, as is Daz Bach, once he gets going there’s no stopping him. All of the lads are great on a night out to be fair and we’ve had some absolute belting ones

Joe was kind enough to provide this photo of Evo
Worst on a night out - my mate Jamie Breese gets very loose after a beer but I couldn’t really put my finger on anyone really. Brads has the worst gear but he’s a good laugh after a shandy.

Biggest Moaner - Yes I’m the worst moaner but I just hate losing and I can’t help myself. It doesn’t help that Fish can’t count! But because I can’t choose myself I’ll say Evo. It’s close call between him and Brooky but I’ve never seen anyone spit their dummy as bad as Evo when he gets subbed, and then I have to hear him complain in the car on the way home whilst Noah’s singing in the back.

Who would I not want in my relay team?
Jay Crowther - but he’s been smashing the running during the lockdown so could prove me wrong.
Sion Brads is weighed down by his big Beyoncé bum and he’d probs end up running the wrong way and end up back in Blaenau.
Peo
The big Giraffe, Gary Edwards, but maybe he could blind the other competitors with them white teeth of his.
Lastly, I’ll choose Mike Peo because he’d defo get injured after five meters.
If Cai Babs was still at the club he’d have made the team though but if there was a photo finish his big nose would give him a huge advantage

Funniest moment - there’s been a hell of a lot over the years but I’ll go with when Eards absolutely pied Fish live on ‘Sgorio’. He was absolutely raging and we all hammered him for 
it!

Next up I’ll go for Gareth Melvin Evans....

Thursday 7 May 2020

Team Mates: Oh Danny, Danny....


Linford Christie........Justin Gaitlin.........Usain Bolt.........Danny Brookwell. I'm sure you'll know what I'm suggesting. All four of these men are turbo towered and, luckily for us, one of them plays for Caernarfon Town. 
I can't speak for anyone else but, as far as I'm concerned, Danny Brookwell is the fastest footballer I've seen. In fact, he he's so fast that he'll sometimes run ahead the ball when he's sprinting down the flank for us but we wouldn't have it any other way. 
'Brooky' has come a long way since his goalscoring debut for us at Buckley a few years ago and is a firm favourite of the fans. He's played for the Cofis, represented his country for Wales 'C' and has now featured in the blog, so Danny's done pretty well for himself!
On a serious note, Danny's not one of the team's big noises and so it's great that he's been so quick to take part in this series of quick interviews. Maybe we can carry out a mor in-depth version some time in the future? 
For now, however, let's see what he has to say about his team-mates.... 
Fish gets ready for dinner at Brooky's

Which three team mates would you invite for dinner and why? And what would you cook for them? 

Three guests: 
Firstly Daz Bach. Some of the stories he comes out with after a pint are unbelievable, He does an incredible Irish accent.

Then I would have Joe and Fish and watch them go at each other. I dont think I would stop laughing all night.

Meal: It would have to be fajitas night. Quick, easy and plenty of time for beers. We could all dress as Mexicans like the Cofi Army. 

Ideal person to be stuck on a desert with?
Breese dog. We could come up with a few workouts to pass time and I could learn some tips on how to get big biceps.
Worst trainer:

Rambo for the clean sweep purely because he is never there.
Sam joins Caernarfon with a new haircut
Worst barber:

There has been a lot of support for Brads on this one but to be fair to him he can’t help the few strands left on the top of his head. Also, if anyone hasn't seen Sam Jones's mop before joining Caernarfon look it up!

Worst banter:
Osh Goulding, he needs to up his game before joining the RAF.

Big Huw
Hardman:
The amount of black eyes he has had this season you would think Jamie Crowther. But I've got to go with Huw Griffiths on this one. I wouldn’t want to get the wrong side of him!

The biggest joker:
100% Eards he loves the sound of his own voice and raises the morale of the team. We were all sat ready in Connah’s Quay once and Eards was running late. He ran in the dressing room and did a Klinsmann across the deck.

Good on a night out:
Although I spent a day and a half in bed, from what I saw of the weekend in Cardiff, Gruff has some moves in his locker and he can sing too. Top lad and a great laugh.
Breesey loves throwing some moves....

Worst on a night out:
I don’t know about this one. Every time we go out together we have a laugh, it’s a great bunch of lads. If I had to say then maybe Jamie Breese. He’s an angry man and goes missing. One night we had in Liverpool I thought he was long gone back to the hotel but bumped into him at 2am dancing on his own. Fair to say he hasn’t got Gruff's moves.

Biggest moaner:
Got to be the twins Joe and Evo. They both love a good moan.

Who would you not want in your 4x100m relay team?
Jamie Crowther
Gaz Eds runs like he is treading water and Jamie Crowther towes a caravan, so those two certainly wouldn't make the cut. 

I wouldn't want Rambo either because he would probably drop the baton.

The fourth person is Noah, he would probably slide tackle someone and get us disqualified.

Funniest moment:
Haydock races. Gaz Eds decided to stop to get cash out just before the train was leaving. We all got on the train and as the train was leaving I could just see a giraffe running through the crowd. One of the songs of the day was 'he loves a cash machine, he missed the train.'

Next up is Joe Williams………

Wednesday 6 May 2020

Big Gaz, Tony Angelino and Dishing the Dirt!


It’s been eight weeks since the FAW’s decision to suspend all matches in the Welsh system. It was, without doubt, the correct call and although every sane person will understand and agree with it, this mid-season hiatus has seemed to have lasted much, much longer.
I’ve always been a huge fan of the game but don’t think I’ve realised, until now, just how big a part of my life it is, and I’m sure most who read this will empathise with that.
Things I miss include the obvious; watching the match, catching up with everyone before kick-off and, once the action is underway, seeing everyone in their usual spots around the ground. Most of us are creatures of habit and certainly this extends to football. For example, if Gaz wins the pre-match toss-up, I know we'll be playing towards the Rondo Stand with the Cofi Army on  Danny Brookwell's side of the pitch. If the team is kicking towards the supporters club end I’ll always find the Cofi Army behind and to the left of the goal and, at the other end of the goal, behind and to its right, I’ll catch up with other diehards such as Paul Wills, Jim Edwards, Harry R & I and John Watkins.
The groundsman, Wyn, will be either adjacent to the ‘D’ at the end of the penalty area or at the door of the porta cabin near the corner flag, and I’ll also always see Jamie Breese’s father, Keith, in that vicinity, usually enjoying a cigarette with a smile on his face. Little things maybe, but all of which have become a part of going to the match at the Oval. And all of which I miss. 
Likewise the away matches, where I miss the chippy in Caersws on the way down to mid and South Wales and a McDonalds on the way home. Although most of all I miss the constant bullshit and football talk with my mate Bobby on our travels!
We’re all still awaiting guidance from the FAW with regards to what will happen with the remainder of the season but, no matter how things pan out, not every club will be happy with the outcome.
For Caernarfon, we have two excellent opportunities of clinching a first ever European tie, courtesy of a guaranteed play-off spot and also a Welsh Cup semi-final. If the season was to be curtailed now, how much of a disappointment would it be for everyone involved with the club? To be so close to making history and not given the opportunity to reach our goals would be heartbreaking but, under the circumstances, we're in the lap of the Gods.
There are numerous clubs in the same position of course whilst others I’m sure would welcome voiding the campaign as it would see them cling on to their league present status. 
These are all scenarios that will need to be concluded in some way or another and my hope is that the game's powers that be don’t void the campaign – the present campaign is called the 2019/20 season so surely we have until the end of the year to conclude it? However, if it is announced that league positions are to be decided by a points per game formula, then those teams with a vested interest (ie in relegation positions) will simply have to man up and accept that they haven't been good enough for the most of the season.
European qualification is a totally different proposition as there is a spot open to winners of the Welsh Cup so the FAW will need to look at this very carefully. If the season is cancelled, who gets that spot? 
I’m sure each of us have gone over all kinds of scenarios on how to conclude the campaign and European places and, however difficult it is to see any light at the end of the tunnel, things will surely work out eventually, both on and off the pitch.
Yes, football is important to us but, in the grand scheme of things, it means little when compared to everyone’s health and well being.
In the meantime, we’re all having to deal with things the best we can, and it was great to see Sean Eardley and the squad getting together recently for a quiz night on the Zoom platform. I believe that Kevin Sheret, the goalkeeping coach, came out on top and I was encouraged to see that there was plenty of competitiveness to the proceedings. I read on Twitter that Gareth Edwards thought there was even some cheating going on, which is disappointing or extremely funny, depending on what you think of the Big Man!  
I was also intrigued to see that Super Leo Smith turned up for the quiz dressed as Tony Angelino, the crooner with the speech impediment who made such a mark in Only Fools and Horses all those years ago. 
Something I forgot to mention in the last blog was the cancellation of the Wales ‘C’ match that had been scheduled to take part at the Oval in March.
As the club's media officer I've been asked many times by reporters in recent weeks about how the club is surviving and something that always crops up in the discussion is the aforementioned fixture and the loss of revenue to the club due to its cancellation.
However, instead of dwelling on the financial implications to the club, I've been thinking more about the disappointment of the would-be participants and especially of course, the three Caernarfon players who were in the Welsh squad. Alex Ramsay, Leo Smith and Darren Thomas were all on the verge of representing their country in the most prestigious match at this level of football and I can only imagine how frustrating it must have been for them, especially Leo and Darren, who would hopefully have been making their debuts for the side.
Rambo
We haven't heard anything regarding the possibility of rescheduling the fixture but if it happens, I think it's only fair that the FAW bring it back to the Oval. I believe that one of the reasons for selecting our ground was because it generates a real atmosphere and that will always be the case so there shouldn't really be a problem in bringing it back to Caernarfon. Can you imagine how good it would be to hear the Cofi Army chanting for Rambo, Leo and the Cofi Messi as they battle their English counterparts?
Before moving on from this subject, it's worth mentioning the excellent gesture the Cofi Army has made with regards to the tickets for the cancelled match. As soon we the club announced that refunds are to be paid when the lockdown is lifted, an impressive number of supporters told the club they didn't want the refund and to keep the money. These are difficult times for everyone and this response goes a long way in showing how fortunate we are to have such loyal supporters. 
Everyone who has read the blog over the last five years will be aware that I don't use it to make 'official' statements but, under the circumstances, I think it's acceptable of me, as chairman of the club, to thank everyone who has made this kind gesture. The money will be a great help to us as we navigate through such difficult times. Diolch o galon pawb! 
The club received a boost recently by successfully applying for the Domestic and UEFA licences. Everyone will already know the importance of both licences, being that they are a club’s entry cards to both the Cymru Premier League and European competition, based on qualification, of course. Our licencing officer, Marc Roberts, deserves a lot of credit for this, as does General Manager Darren Billinghurst and a host of other volunteers who have worked hard in ensuring the criteria was met.
As is always the case, some clubs have failed in their applications and there has been plenty of finger pointing and accusations of skulduggery about the whole licencing process. Caernarfon Town has been there not too long ago and so we all know how it feels to fail the criteria and be denied promotion to the top tier. 
I believe that where the FAW may be getting it wrong with regards to the whole process is that they don't publish the reasons why clubs are denied the licence. Of course, it may well be that this is due to confidentiality but, as it stands now, they are opening themselves up to criticism. Simply put, it should be the governing body's responsibility to publish the results, although I do think that the clubs have a role to play in it. Unless both parties are totally transparent with the reasons for a failed application then there will always be debate and false rumours.
Anyway, back to Cofi matters now and how we're trying to at least raise a few smiles during the lockdown. A fortnight ago, Eards sent me a message, suggesting that we should start a new series of Q & A's with members of the first team management and playing squad, with the sole intent of dishing some well-intentioned dirt on their team mates! It's basically a form of written banter and, if the manager thought it was a good idea then who was I to turn him down?
Due to the nature of the series I thought it would be good to include photos with the answers and, as the facility to do this is not available on the club's website, Oval Ways was the ideal platform to present the dirt-dishing! I was also slightly concerned at the prospect of publishing 'banter' on the club's official website, and so far, everything seems to have worked well.
The management and players have all taken on the challenge and the 'Team Mates' series has proved very popular up to now. In fact, the series has provided lots of positive feedback and, from what I have read, it seems to be raising a smile with the clubs' stakeholders, which is is the most important thins. If you haven't read any of the entries in the series, just have a look on the blog and you'll be able to catch up. 
And finally, I was impressed to see both Gareth Edwards and Jamie Crowther taking on, and successfully completing the five 'keepy up wall bounces' challenge, which they shared on Twitter recently. I think Darren Thomas and Nathan Craig could probably do just as well with blindfolds on but it was still good going by the Big Guys!
Stay Safe and Keep the Faith!